Friday, December 31, 2004

the end of another year...

I took everything back today - the stuff that didn't fit and people didn't want and whatnot. and while listening to the radio, this one station kept asking people who called in: "What is your favourite memory from 2004?"

and then i got to thinking, what is my favourite memory of 2004? and i couldn't think of one.
why is it that the bad events always embed themselves in your memory more strongly than the good ones?
and i didn't have it bad this year, i really didn't. i have some really good times. maybe it's just because this past month has not been enjoyable. i don't know.

or maybe i'm just a whiner.

the following song is for Mr Gaskin

thank you for seating me with your family, because you were family to me.
your funeral was beautiful yesterday and i am glad that you are no longer in pain.
so many people came, the church was overfilled. everyone had the best things to say, except me because i couldn't say anything at all without breaking down and crying.
i was so glad i could find the songs that you requested. it was one last thing i could do for you and i was so happy to do it.
so goodbye Mr. Gaskin. you were, and are my hero.

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

i have no shoes that go with sad

how do you dress for a funeral? or a visitation?
i know that anything i wear will from now on remind me that he has died
but i have no dark clothes really
i want to look nice for him, he was, as Daphne put it, "One of the last gentlemen".
he was my favourite

but it's better this way, he was sick for a long time

i'm wearing the same thing to the funeral tomorrow as i am to the visitation tonight.
i can't do two outfits. i just can't.

good bye Mr Gaskin. i will love you and miss you every day.
you were more of a grandfather to me than mine ever was
you are an amazing man, and i will forever aim to be even a little bit like you.

i should have played more chess with you.
i really should have.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

in the last 20 hours...

i am girlfriend no more...
i have had things said about me...and about him...
i have been lied to...
...and Mr. Gaskin died - he was more of a grandfather to me than my own

i really hate today

Friday, December 24, 2004


current mood: content
listening to: ATB, The Smear Campaign
reading: Captain Underpants with Taylor
watching: currently -> Little Bear, last night -> CSI and Without a Trace
msn name: "step carefully or she'll bite your head off!"

Thursday, December 23, 2004

and then...

my door froze shut
took me 30 mins just to scrape off all the ice

oh dear

and also: i now remember why xmas is stressfull.
watch where you step or my mother will bite your head off
apparently there are NO JEANS ALLOWED for xmas dinner.
and romaine lettuce is a pain and that's why i'm difficult (yea i know...don't try to figure it out)

snow snow and more snow!

it snowed at least 25cms of snow last night
drove to Taylor's this morning and got stuck about 10 ft from her driveway. i had to dig myself out


Wednesday, December 22, 2004

the weirdest thing happened...

on the way to the Spongebob Squarepants Movie today.

Setting: driving on the QEW highway in the slow lane (for no particular reason) with three kiddies in the car aged, 5, 9, & 13.
Time: 2:50pm
In: my car, Joey

Details: so we're driving along grooving along to the sound of my latest Garage Band musical creation when suddenly i realize that as i am still pressing on the gas pedal, it is not accelorating the engine. not good. so i pull over...wait no i glide over to the side of the highway and test it again, still nothing. sound coming out, but no movement. so i call my dad, he's on the phone. call my mom, she's all freaking out. meanwhile i'm laughing cause i'm like, oh dear - what a time for this to happen. i knew i couldn't be out of gas cause i had a quarter of a tank still so i had no clue. anyways, long story short, i started the car again and tried it and it worked fine. so weird. so we drove to a gas station, got gas, drove to the movie theatre and got there even before the previews/millions-of-commercials started.

Final Thoughts: so odd.
Movie: it was enjoyable.

Thursday, December 16, 2004

places i think the best

1. in the shower
2. driving, while listening to rap music

Tuesday, December 14, 2004


I am so sorry to everyone who has shown support for this concert from the beginning. First we were kicked out of the 360 and now Moe's Tavern has been shut down by the government. so obviously the show is cancelled.

Again my sincerest apologies to the bands and everyone who was involved. i can't tell you how upset i am about this right now.
We'll try for another one in the new year.

Just Bounce right?

(who is very sad right now)

Friday, December 10, 2004

now how do you answer this question??

Since quitting Sunrise, i got a job for December looking after Taylor, a 5 yr old little girl
she has TaeKwando on Tuesdays and Thursdays. her TaeKwando place just happens to be RIGHT next to the Pure Gold strip club on Lakeshore.

so today she points at the strip club sign and asks me:
"What do they do in there Lizzy?"
so i'm thining, oh i tell her:
"it's a place for mommies and daddies" then think, crap i can't tell her that, she's going to think her parents go there!
so then i correct myself and say "it's for grownups"

she then asks me:
"what do they do in there?"
so i told her i didn't know and we did silly walks inside the TaeKwando building

it was quite funny.
try explaining a strip club to a five year old

Thursday, December 09, 2004

alarms and fire trucks oh my

as i was saying to some of my friends recently -> my jobs after sunrise involve much less stress
well not tonight! haha

setting: babysitting. two kiddies asleep. one girl one boy ages 11 and 13. 10:45pm. doing homework and talking on MSN.

long story short: the house alarm goes off telling me there is a fire somewhere in the house. the loudest most piercing sound you'll ever hear. can't turn it off. look everywhere and there's no fire. the alarm company calls - i don't have any of the security codes so they call the fire dept. can't reach the parents. THREE (3) fire trucks arrive at the house just as i get a call back from the mother with the number to deactivate the alarm. the firemen look all over the house, can't find anything, same as me. grandfather shows up cause the alarm company called their "in case of emergency" person and that's him.

everything was fine. there was no fire. no one knows why it went off.
kids didn't even wake up
it was kinda funny
never had the fire dept come to a house i was babysitting at before!

k. sleep time.

Monday, December 06, 2004

i have figured it out

i'm not busy enough and it's causing me to stress

i'm not nearly as stressed out as i should be
i'm not used to this relaxed shit
i need to busy myself up quick.
i'm lacking stress and therefore creating stress around other things that really don't need it!

please leave suggestions of things for me to do that involve activity and appointments and schedules and busyness!
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i can't seem to catch my breath

Current mood: distressed

it's escaped me

and i don't feel right

Friday, December 03, 2004

it's been a while hasn't it?

my dearest readers. i am sorry for leaving for a while.

so here's the deal. in the time of my absence, i have discovered:
1. a new love for myspace
2. that being sick is not fun at all and is not a good idea in the middle of "everything is due" week
3. carbonated drinks will cause bottles to explode/leak all over your bag if you pour it in and close them
4. i am smiling a lot and i like it :)
5. cats might not be all that bad......i said might
6. they make fuzzy boobs that hang on the rearview mirror in the car - who knew?
7. "certain" downtown toronto clubs suck because they kick charity shows out for paying ones even when they have confirmed the charity show. assish.
8. i quite enjoy the mohawk (and do not know how it's spelt!)
9. i do NOT want it to snow. ETA w/o snow: 30-40mins. ETA w/ snow: 1.5hrs - never.
10. nothing good can come from worrying about what might happen. i will not change the world or someone's mind by worrying. i will only cause myself to stress. and stress is currently not an item on my menu.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

a list

ppl who still owe me HBL cake: